The goal of this blog post is going to mainly be directed at home sickness.
I think a few people have brought up the question for me “are you home sick?” To me this question kind of has two answers to it, let me attempt to explain it.
First off I typically don’t get home sick, and when I think of it I never really have… let’s just clear things up, it’s not that I don’t miss anyone or don’t care for them, it’s very much the opposite. I love my mom, my family and my friends despite only having a few. The way I look at things, is I will see them again or that’s the expectation/ intention, or that I will be in contact with them . You don’t need to go through life seeing the people you care about all the time especially if you know you get to see them again. This stint in Haiti is a little longer than I’m normally away from people that are close to me, and I still find I’m not finding myself home sick… Kind of.
Recently I haven’t been online as much, as well haven’t been able to talk with my best friend. Weirdly I’ve been finding myself missing her and it’s rather strange for me to miss some one as stated above. I guess I’ve truly found a friend that I’ve finally confided in and that I’ve given my heart to and will always trust and love; not being able to share my experiences with her because we’re both busy or because of bad timing, has actually affected me and has me feeling I guess… “home sick”.
The feeling I get does at times make me want to just go home for a day and say “hey, I miss you!” and give her the biggest hug and then head back to help Emily but… I think it would be a bit costly to do so haha.
I’ve done a lot of growing personally in the past 3 – 4 years, from my dad passing away to going to detox, and come to think of it even meeting Krystina (best friend); Haiti is also having an affect on me as well emotionally I think… come on I cried a little leaving my mom in the airport, that is so not the normal me, but I digress. The past few days I’ve been trying to figure out the lesson or meaning behind the feelings and how I’ve been dealing with them. I think today it may have sunk in a bit and that maybe I was feeling a little scared of being vulnerable in a different country away from my comforts so to speak. Normally I’m fine with being vulnerable but that’s back at home with my friends or my bedroom or car… all my comforts. Haiti has a hard edge to it I find but also a softness, I think now I’m coming to grips with; it’s okay to be open with yourself even in the uncomfortable places.
Some ways I think are good to deal with home sickness;I’ll try to cover for anyone who may be gearing up to travel, planning to or even are already out in the “wilderness”. First: I want to say look to God, He’ll always be there for you even when you don’t think of Him. Just take a second or two to pray. Second: Take time to yourself, have “quiet time” (this can even be a nap!), put on music sit on your bed/cot/floor-mat, where ever! Find your self a “safe place”, at home my safe place is usually my car or near water. In Haiti my safe place is usually outside or just somewhere quiet. Lastly: If you have a friend or family member you are close to TALK. Talking is one of the best ways to get emotions out and help you get past some of the roughest times. Oh I also forgot write things down, you can read it after or you can burn it so no one ever see’s it, what ever you feel works for you.
One last thing I want to share I’m sure you can tie it into home sickness somehow but I liked this proverb: “Spilled water isn’t picked up”. Pretty much what this means is that you shouldn’t sweat the small things that have happened even sometimes the big things. Just read it over a few times and think about it.
Have a great day/ night everyone.
Miss you Tee.
Broken Eye Balls <3